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On Valentine's Day it is appropriate to consider whether humans, and perhaps at least some other species, are so addicted to love that they cannot exist without it. Is love really like an addictive drug? What are the features that define perception of beauty and attraction to co-exist exclusively with others? Is sex without love simply a distraction from failure to get involved in the main event, or an admission that the main event is not primarily about sex?
A cursory look at the internet will show you that there are organisations catering for individuals who consider that they are either addicted to love or sex! Even Einstein recognised how the power of love, just like pain, can appear to subvert the laws of time:. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. Albert Einstein. Leaving aside for the moment whether love really is a form of addiction, there is no getting away from the fact that love, and all that goes with it, is more important to us humans than almost anything else.
Failure to make lasting relationships, and relationship break-ups are a major contributor to stress, anxiety and depression. We write poetry, plays, songs and books, make films and gossip about love, relationships and sex far more than anything else and yet from a scientific point of view hardly anyone dares to study it. Perhaps it is something we simply take for granted and which needs no scientific interpretation. Perhaps when it is explained it will turn out to be something that is not uniquely human but a simple expression of the biological drive to reproduce that we see in all other species.
Love, in truth, is both a magnificent and debilitating obsession! In short when in the throws of love you are pretty much useless for anything in life outside of trying to consummate your need for the person you are in love with.
